Thank you

Thank you, mom and dad, for never listening. Thank you, dad, for telling me bad guys with power will always win. I will live my life to prove that you are wrong. Thank you, dad, for making me determined not to marry someone like you. Thank you, mom, for shutting the door. I’m tired of making my voice heard too, so thanks for making sure that I know you won’t listen. Thank you, for inspiring me what I need to do for my children to know them.

Thank you, sister, for being rude. I’ve learned a lot from your mistakes. I love you and I will always try to do what I can for you, but your full-of-yourself attitude will only harm you.

Thank you, Gemini, for putting up with me and not trying to dig up my past. You said you loved every moment with me, but I’m not sure if you do when I yelled, when I fainted from anger and stress, or when I turned my back on you, faced the wall and cried in my sleep.

Thank you, money, for making me realize that I fucking hate you. I fucking hate you.

Thank you, Libra. All of you have never stood up for me, but thanks for not doing so. Thanks to your betrayal and abandon and all, I am able to get back on my feet, and I don’t hate any of you.

Thank you, Sagittarius, for letting me know that people grow and change. I have about three of you as former close friends. One of you has done extraordinary things, things I can never imagine because you loved me, and you linger here and there, never showing up in front of me again. One of you claimed to love me and want me to be happy even if you are not the one I love, and we were never close as before again. One of you has turned from a close friend to my hater without a fight, and I think it’s only fair to call you a pussy.

Thank you, Scorpio, for making me understand how pitiful it is to be so insecure. I have never stolen anything from you, and I never will.

Thank you, future roommate, for making me understand that my tolerance has a limit.

Thank you, best friends, for growing old with me, for leaving me alone when it’s my fight, for cheering me up and making me forget about my bad days.

Thank you, bullies and liars, for making me stronger. How I stood up to you makes who I am today.

Thank you, haters who don’t even know me in person. Thank you just for not knowing me in person.

Thank you, bros, for letting me know you guise better. You guys are not full of drama, and I love you guise for that.

Things I most often wish I could say and Things I did say

But I didn’t, due to stupid social norms and my own standard of politeness.

  • You are rude.
  • Have you always been this rude?
  • I’m disappointed.
  • Stop being a pussy.
  • Can you tell me when the last time you wronged me and actually apologized was?
  • When you stop me from saying anything in AN ARGUMENT because you’re not done, it signifies that after your turn, it will be mine. You made a promise and you have to recognize it. So tell me how do you plan to keep it by walking away, turning your back, and shutting the door when I’m taking my turn?
  • If you want to make me believe that you want to listen to me, at least pretend that you are trying.
  • I don’t think you deserve to be listened to when you never even listen to my side of the story.
  • I love you and I’m sorry for hurting both of us. But I won’t apologize for you wronging me.
  • They are pushing you around.
  • She is pushing you around.
  • If you think you know anything about my life, try to answer at least half of these questions. One, last name of the people I hated the most in my life up to this point. Two, name four of my best girl friends and where they come from. Three, names of the guys I ever loved. Four, tell me about my jobs, the positions, what I do at work. Five, tell me about all of my achievements. Six, tell me my side of the story when I was bullied by my homeroom teacher and the kids in junior high. If you can’t tell at least half of these questions, don’t tell me that I don’t know who I am. I do know who I am. You don’t know who I am.
  • You and I were bullied when we were young because we were different from everyone else. I grew up hating bully. You grew up being a part of the bullies. You are all that I don’t want to become, especially when they say the environment shapes the personality.

And these are things that I did say, some of which I’m even proud of:

  • I’m a jerk.
  • I’m a witch.
  • I can’t change what people think of me, I can only change myself. Some will still hate me regardless.
  • Why, what, how many people hate me are none of my business.
  • I don’t care when people I know hate me. Why do you think I would care when people, who I don’t know, hate me?
  • You can’t insult people and expect them to respect you. Because of what? Because you insult them in an ugly way?
  • You know nothing about my life.
  • You know, what goes around comes around. You think they got your back when you and them badmouth me, someone they don’t even know. Only if you know that they, who don’t even know you in person, would soon turn on you.